Friday, January 19, 2007

The Sanhedrin Shuffle

I'm not ashamed of laughing at my own jokes, but when I walked by a tap dancing class in the RB this morning and the phrase "The Sanhedrin Shuffle" burst, uninvited, into my head, I laughed (seemingly spontaneously) to a shocking degree. I'm not sure what it means, but something about the blending (yes, it blends!) of vaudeville and ancient Israel tickles me deep inside. (Coming next: The Torah Two-Step ...)

In other news, the prophesy of the Burning of the Ham was fulfilled last night.

See, Genuine was a ham for Halloween. Not just a ham, but the Ham in which Scout (of To Kill a Mockingbird fame) was attacked by Bob Ewell and saved by Boo Radley, accurate down to the really bad visibility. It was the best costume I've ever seen. She won first place at my Halloween party, and she proudly sported her trophy as best she could (her fingers just barely poked out of the bottom, y'see, and it was easy for her to bump into things).

So for two and a half months this ham has been in Genuine's living room, and she's been conspiring to burn it the whole time. Last night (after an incredible episode of The Office and a really quite fantastic 24 Hour Film Festival), Genuine, Yellow, Roommates H and ahem, and I took the ham to the Old Apartment. I'm not sure why we went there, other than the fact that Old Apartment rules are kind of lax, and there is a history of tenants getting away with all sorts of parking lot pyrotechnics. Plus, I think Genuine and I just miss the place. It still has that old ward charm.

It was transcendentally cold last night, but we burned it nonetheless, around the corner by the dumpster. It took a while to get started, but it burned pretty well once it caught. It smelled kind of good, I thought, and the structural Cheezit boxes began to melt and drip onto the asphault. We took some blurry photographs. All sorts of cleverness ensued, such as references to "hot ham fire", and rounds of "Meet me down at the little brown joint". I thought up loads of puns that I refrained from using last night but which I will share with you now: "highly hammable material", "baconflagration", and "going out in a glaze of glory." Imagine those in contexts.

So that's what happened last night. Yellow eventually found a snow shovel, so we mixed some snow with the embers and loaded it into the dumpster. Then we all drove home, cold and satisfied.

4 reason(s) to click here:

Genuine Draft said...

Baconflagration?! Glaze of Glory?! Krebscout, I doff my hat to you - these are the best puns I've ever heard. Also, thank you for being there when my ham and I nedded you most.

ahem. said...

"...We mixed some snow with the embers and loaded it into the dumpster."

Uh, what do you mean we? I practically froze my hands off holding that shovel, I think I should at least get credit for it.

Eliza said...

i. cannot. believe. that i was not invited on this adventure!!!

so offended. truly.

New Yorker said...

I was wondering what the mess was late that night. Now putting two and two together (seeing the car), it all makes sense. You missed the fireballs on Saturday night though. :D GOod times.